We're in a bit of a bind. One that we've been in before. And God always brings us out.
Yesterday, I had bit of a pour-out session with God. He gave hubby a lovely raise over the summer, trusting us to use it wisely, and we haven't really done that. Oh, our intentions were good, certainly, but our practices left much to be desired. God has given us enough for everything we need, but because we have not been timely in the paying of our bills, we are left with nothing. So, so wrong.
So here we are in this pickle again. Totally, completely our fault. Yet God is still gracious. He has gotten us out of these binds before (even when it doesn't make sense that He should), and I believe and am trusting that He will deliver us from this one, too.
It is in that spirit of expectation (I'm "preparing for rain," so to speak) that I am deciding to chronicle the deliverance this time. It has already begun, and in my new attitude of gratefulness and proper stewardship, I want to consciously notice and remember what He does.
Yesterday, we decided we have two major bills to fit into the remainder of our paycheck (the next of which is still a week and a half away). I'm still unsure of the actual amount of one of them, but if my memory serves, our bank account was really close to that total yesterday.
Enter Provision #1: my mom paid us her half of the cable bill, which should put us up to, if not a few dollars over, what we need for those two bills. (I'm choosing not to get caught up in the detail that I have yet to figure out what that second amount is, and if it's higher than I remember, we're screwed again. I'm choosing to trust it will work out.)
Another issue was that with those two bills, there would be nothing left over for any gas in my car next week, or the diapers I was sure we'd need by then. Provision #2: when I went upstairs to get a diaper for Mr. 2yo this morning, I found I had a good chunk of diapers left in his basket, and two fresh packages in the box, yet unopened! Praise God!
That realization was really when I decided to start keeping track. I went upstairs for the diaper, saw the extra diapers in the box, and continued on like nothing had happened. It was a few minutes later that I realized this was an answered prayer! And I decided I wanted to be much more intentional about noticing when God answers my prayers!
Now I write in expectation, waiting to see how else God will prove Himself worthy!
And this time, rather than simply selfishly expecting God's grace,
I am watching for it, waiting for it, with reverance and gratitude.
I too have been convicted about our money "blessings" and not being a good steward. Thank you for your transparency. I pray God covers you all this month and that you continue to count your answered prayers!! It really builds our trust in Jesus!
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